January 9th, 2024
Hello,
I keep wanting to write but the time of day I feel most inspired and have the juices flowing is normally when I am walking. Unfortunately I can’t stop to type because I have Shipley attached to my hip, literally, and pushing Dot in the stroller with my hands. One day there will be a way to record your thoughts.
…Now thinking about it, that might be too intrusive…
I guess this is the way to record your thoughts, you know… writing them down?
But sometimes I think faster than I write and I can’t always get it down the way I think about it. So….. some thoughts are gone in the wind or the abyss of my head I guess.
I’m feeling tired today. I woke up around 6:30 having to pee and then couldn’t go back to sleep. I woke up, started making some sour dough and then Dot woke up shortly after. I always love hearing her play with her stuffies, just entertaining herself while shes in the crib. I can already see her being such a nurturing person. I love that about her.
I’ve been rethinking the book I want to write and considering it to now be about resentment that I’ve been harboring thus far in my life. Now that im 30 I’d really like to let that shit go and be able to fully take advantage of my life instead of obsessing over things that have happened and fake conversations. I have my own family now to think of and take care of. I dont have time to bog myself down with resentments and allow that to affect me in my life now. Its time to move the fuck on.
A) 5 gratitudes
B) Plans for the day, or tomorrow
C) Any fears or resentments
D) Things to watch out for
E) Things to strive for
A) 1. I am grateful for my healthy, happy and curious daughter.
2. I am grateful for her strong communication skills. Her confidence in her word. And her honesty.
3.I am grateful for having a change of mind set recently and really wanting to change myself.
4. I am grateful for my husband for meeting me at the same place in wanting to transform our selves and the goals we set for the year.
5. I am grateful for all of the self reflection and love my husband has shown himself. I love the man is and the one he is becoming.
B) Today I am going to catch up on some writing. Finish packing up holiday stuff and take Dot to the Thinkery! It’s mommy daughter day/dads day out. Maybe I will get around to reorganizing the kitchen, but honestly probably not. I’m not going to beat myself up if I don’t, just shuffle it back into the to do list.
C) Today I had a fear that I still need to go to the doctor and have my urinary tract checked out. I just keep putting off making the appointment. Honestly its why I got up early and couldn’t fall back asleep. I had this fear that I might have cancer and I don’t know… and couldn’t stop thinking about how that would affect our lives….I need to make an appointment.
D) I need to watch out for me being lazy and not hitting my habits. I need to stay back on top of them. And hold myself accountable.
E) Strive for balance and happiness. A warm and comfortable home. And a soul that is at ease.
